Know Your Stars: Bleach Edition!
by Slothy Girl
Summary: Ichigo using steroids! Hitsugaya's secret revealed! Renji being called a pumpkin head! What's next! Only the broadcaster knows, and you will too if you read on! Insanity and humor ensures... For people who want or like to laugh XD! DISCONTINUED!
1. Ichigo Kurosaki

Hee hee, I remembered a fic like this today and I noticed there wasn't one for Bleach, so I was like "OMG I'm gonna write one for Bleach" and well, here we are.

Disclaimer- I don't own "All That" or "Bleach" even though I wish I did

**Bold is the Broadcaster (you could say it was me, but… XD)**

Normal is the Character

_Italics is the "Up Next" person speaking_

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**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars-**

**Ichigo Kurosaki… Secretly wants to become a pink haired girl like Yachiru.**

Pink –twitch- I hate pink. And I don't want to be a girl. I am perfectly fine being a guy.

**Ichigo Kurosaki… Became a shinigami to pay the electric bills.**

What??? I don't have to pay the electric bills, my dad does that.

**Ichigo Kurosaki… Hates to admit he pays the bills at home.**

I just said my dad does that! There's no admitting to something I don't do!

**Ichigo Kurosaki… Is in denial.**

-twitch twitch- There's nothing to be in denial about!

**Ichigo Kurosaki… Loves Momo Hinamori.**

WTF! Who the hell is Momo?!

**He's still in denial.**

I am not!!! About anything!!!

**How can I trust a strawberry?**

I am not a strawberry!

**Your name means strawberry, so that must mean you're a strawberry.**

You know nothing you dumb ass!

**Whatever… Ichigo Kurosaki… He takes steroids before every battle, so he wins.**

WTH! I do not!!!!

**How can I believe a cheater?**

I am not a cheater!!!

**Cheater Cheater Pumpkin Eater!**

SHUT THE HELL UP!!!!!

**Ohh scary!!! And now you know, Ichigo Kurosaki –runs off-**

WHAT THE HELL???? THEY KNOW NOTHING ABOUT ME!!! AND GET BACK HERE, DAMN IT!!!

_Up Next: Toshiro Hitsugaya!!!_

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Hee hee, I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! Leave a review on your way out!

I would like to give special thanks to **Sasukes-girl08 **because her fic gave me the idea and inspiration to write something like this! Hee hee!


	2. Toshiro Hitsugaya

I updated for all who reviewed and Thanks you, you guys rock! Hee hee, now it's time for another chapter of "_Know Your Stars: Bleach Style!_"

Disclaimer- I don't own anything, except for the broadcasting, but even that's not really mine XD

**Bold is Broadcaster**

Normal is the character

_The "up next" voice thing… don't ask XD_

_------_

**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars-**

**Toshiro Hitsugaya… Hates to admit he thinks Momo would look better covered with peanut butter (with clothes on you perverts).**

What?! I don't even know what this "peanut butter is!"… Does it taste better than one of those dishes Matsumoto puts out?

**Yes**

Alrighty then, I'll try it some time. Hmm.

**Toshiro Hitsugaya… Is an undercover elementary student.**

What?! What gave you that idea! And I am not an elementary student, Damn it!

**Toshiro Hitsugaya… Is short… very short.**

I prefer the term 'vertically challenged' thank you very much.

**So you admit it!**

I do not!

**You just did!**

Just get on with this stupid display, it's taking time-

**Out of your growth spurt.**

WTH??? That doesn't make any sense!

**It does too make sense!**

You're crazy!

**Tsk Tsk, anyway… Toshiro Hitsugaya… Is an old, short man.**

I am not old! And didn't I just tell you I prefer the term 'vertically challenged!'

**Then explain the white hair! What did you do, stick your hand in an electrical socket???!!**

… possibly…

**-gap- Wow… and they call you a prodigic genius. **

Prodigic isn't a word.

**That doesn't prove anything!**

Pft, whatever.

**-sigh- Toshiro Hitsugaya… Will be from here on known as Shiro because his name is too long. We're shortening it –waves arms around- YAY!**

You can't do that! And it's Hitsugaya-taicho to you!

**Wow, it sure took you a long time too figure out that we haven't been calling you by your "title." If you can call it that.**

Shut up! You are so weird!

**At least I didn't electrocute myself! I mean, come on Shiro!**

THAT'S IT! WHERE ARE YOU???!!

**I am here, yet I am not here.**

What's that supposed to mean!

**And I thought you were a genius… -shakes head- Now you know, Toshiro Hitsugaya.**

What!? Get back here so I can-

_-transmission has been cut off due to violent and rather gory speech-_

_Up Next: Renji Abarai _

_----_

Ha ha, it's amusing poking fun at characters! Leave a review on your way out! Join us next time, when Renji is called a pumpkin head!! Hee hee, pumpkin head…


	3. Renji Abarai

I am bored… So bored… You know what I'm gonna update! Thank you too all who have reviewed! Alright then! Here is the next chapter of _Know Your Stars- Bleach Style!_

Disclaimer- I own absolutely nothing -sigh- which is kinda depressing.

**Broadcaster**

Character

"_Up Next" thing and security_

----------

**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars-**

**Renji Abarai… Likes to make funny faces behind his captains back.**

WTH?! I do not! I don't disrespect my captain like that!

**Then why do I have a picture telling us different?**

How did you get that?!

**Ha Ha I have my sources.**

Che, whatever.

**Renji Abarai… He hates Rukia and Ichigo.**

I can understand hating Ichigo but hating Rukia, that's just plain cruel!!!

**Sure, Renji Abarai… Is nicknamed pumpkin head.**

WHAT?!!!? Where did you get that?

**-sarcastic- Out of a fortune cookie.**

Really?

**No! You no understand sarcasm. I bet even Shiro would understand!**

-Shiro walks in- I resent that!

**Of course you do! Now get out! This isn't your torture thing!... Of course I can always pick up from last time.**

No!!! But I shall return, I will find out where you are! –Shiro leaves unusually fast-

**-pouts- -sigh- Oh well. So Renji, can I continue now?**

-silently fuming-

**I'll take that as a yes!**

What? WAIT!

**Renji Abarai… Goes by the alias 'Ariel Shortsenhanger' while in the world of the living.**

-jaw drops- What?!!! Where the hell did you get that!?

**Well-**

You know what, don't even tell me!

**-pouts- Aw, ruin my fun. Oh well! Renji Abarai… secretly wishes he knew where I was.**

Got that right!

**Hee hee, Renji Abarai… sleeps with a pink panda plushy Matsumoto gave him when he was 18.**

What?! How did you find that out!?

**So you do, I knew it ha ha ha!**

AGH! I was warned about you, but did I listen, NO! I could have been on _Wheel of Fortune_ but N-O I just had to choose this one.

**Are you talking to yourself?**

No, I was talking to YOU!

**Oh… Then I wasn't listening.**

Grr…Get over here so I can punch your face in!

**I'm getting threatened way to much these days –sigh-. SECURITY!  
**

What? Security?! Oh shi-

_Get down son! Put your hands in the air! Get down on the floor, move it, move it, move it!_

-anime tears- WHY ME!

**-sitting in chair- Ha ha ha, this is so funny! –eats popcorn-… -chokes- oh yea! Ahem, now you know… Renji Abarai, the pumpkin head. **

-getting dragged away- THEY DON'T KNOW ME! DON'T LISTEN TO HER! Oh and HELP!

_Up Next- Rukia Kuchiki _

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As I said before, I was bored so I wanted to get this posted! Hee hee, leave a review on your way out!!!


	4. Rukia Kuchiki

Hello peoples! I hope you are all enjoying your week! Anyway, here is the next chapter of, _Know Your Stars- Bleach Style!_

Disclaimer- I own nothing

**Broadcaster**

Character

"_Up Next" Thingy_

--------------------

**Know your stars, know your stars know your stars-**

**Rukia Kuchiki… Likes to draw bunnies with a rotten pickle.**

Huh? A pickle? Don't be ridiculous!

**Rukia Kuchiki… she enjoys eating bannana peals in her free time.**

EEEWWWWW!!!

**Rukia Kuchiki… She has a funny last name!**

What are you talking about! You are not to disrespect a name of great honor like that.

**U-huh, whatever-**

Stop it!

**Stop what?**

That!

**That what?**

Damn it just stop already!

**Rukia Kuchiki… she has a very loud voice.**

Che.

**Rukia Kuchiki… She is the daughter of a high ranking Hobo Captain!**

WHAT!!!!

**Ha ha ha ha ha! **

Where are you?!

**Ha ha ha!**

Show yourself so I can hurt you!

**Che, ya right.**

Agh! You know what, Ichigo is still looking for you.

**-picking at nails- Ya, so?**

So is Hitsugaya-taicho and Renji.

**Like that's new.**

-twitch- you mean your not afraid?

**Huh, were you talking?**

AGH!

**Rukia Kuchiki… She is an alien from outer space!**

WTFH?!!! Where the hell did you get that!!!

**Your big head.**

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Uh-oh! She's gonna explode her alien guts on us –hides under booth-**

-boom-

**Is it over?**

-breathing heavily with stuffed Chappy toy's head ripped off in her hands-

**-gasp- You killed Chappy!**

What?! –looks at hand- NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

**-sniff- Now you know, Rukia Kuchiki, the big headed alien who hates and kills Chappy.**

-in background- NNNNNOOOOO CHAPPY! WHY OH WHY!

_Up Next- Kisuke Urahara_

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-laughing- that was so funny when I read it over again! I hope you enjoyed this chapter!!! Leave a review on your way out!

Also, I was informed through review that someone did indeed do something just like this. Not exactly (from what I was told the title and plot were similar) but I still want to say thanks to ByaRukiFan for not flaming this when they see it. Much appreciated!


	5. Kisuke Urahara

Hello peoples! I love you all (in a friendly way, in a friendly way!)! You guys rock so much and I am so happy! Thank you all who reviewed! I had a hard time on this one so be nice! Now here's the next chapter of _Know Your Stars- Bleach Style!_

Disclaimer- I own nothing

**Broadcaster show host dude**

Character being tortured… interviewed.

"_Up Next" Thing_

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**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars-**

**Kisuke Urahara… he likes to lick cats.**

That's a disturbing thought.

**Kisuke Urahara… he likes orange pudding.**

I never knew there was such a thing as orange pudding.

**Kisuke Urahara… he is getting annoyed like I want him too.**

-shruggs- what can I say, though there's not much to be annoyed with.

**Yes there is.**

That's what you say.

**Pft. Kisuke Urahara… He is an annoying pervert.**

Got that right sweet thang.

**-twitch- Kisuke Urahara… he likes reading yuri porn on the internet. **

How did you find that out?

**-mutters- Ha ha ha I knew it, he's already getting annoyed by my greatness. –normal voice- I was told by Soul Society.**

Really now… -scratches chin- Interesting.

**Kisuke Urahara… I hate him.**

Don't we all?

**You wish.**

That I do.

**Kisuke Urahara… is annoyed easily so watch out.**

I wouldn't say easily…

**Silence, I kill you!**

Random much.

**Grr, you know what I quit! –walks off-**

-Ichigo, Shiro, Renji, and Rukia run in- Where is she?!

I don't know… -hides face behind fan-

Agh! –the foursome run off-

**Are they gone?**

Yep.

**Kisuke Urahara… I still hate him.**

Or course you do.

**-glares-**

You know, I can't even see you so what's the point?

**Pft whatever… Kisuke Urahara… he loves Yoruichi.**

-sigh dreamily- Yes I do.

**You know, agreeing to all this isn't exactly what you're supposed to do!**

I just do it to annoy you.

**So those things aren't all true?**

No, they were.

**You know what… Kisuke Urahara… I think his hat is stupid.**

-shruggs- Go ahead and hate my hat, it's not like I can stop your hate for it.

–**pouts- -sigh- Now you know, Kisuke Urahara.**

Yep, they sure do.

_Up Next- Isshin Kurosaki!_

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Kisuke was hard; he is so like that though –sigh-. Sorry it's short, but what can you do. I'm gonna need your help to do Isshin so please send me some ideas! Leave a review; it fuels my desire to update at least more than three times a week! Which I have been doing successfully XD! YAY! Also, I won't be able to update twice a day, only once. I have a lot going on but I will try to get one up everyday. Or at least almost everyday, so don't worry 3!


	6. Isshin Kurosaki

-sigh- I'm sorry reviewers for such a long wait but my computer blew up (not really XD) and it took me a while to get it running again, and I had to go over all of your reviews to get ideas for Isshin, so I hope you like this chapter!

Disclaimer- not mine -cries-

**Broadcaster**

Character

"_Up Next"_

-----------

**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars-**

**Isshin Kurosaki… He has a pet goat who thinks he's god.**

I do?!!!

**Isshin Kurosaki… He mimics Tom from ****"Tom and Jerry"**** to** **learn how to stand the pain of getting beaten up by his children.**

How did you find out!?

**I have my sources XD… Isshin Kurosaki… He hates his family.**

-anime tears- I don't hate my family! I love-

-Ichigo kicks Isshin- Shut up old man! –leaves-

**O.o... Ok then… Isshin Kurosaki… ****He is outdone by Ryuuken Ishida in every way possible on the face of the planet.**

WHAT?! –pouts- that's not true.

**Hee hee, Isshin Kurosaki… He secretly wishes he could be a ballerina and is rough on Ichigo to hide his feminine side and love for Chappy.**

-looks scared- H-how did you find out? Can you read my mind?

**-gap- O.O…**

-anime tears-

**Uh… Isshin Kurosaki… He burned his poster of his wife in vengeance.**

Ok, that's where I draw the line! –runs off to poster of wife- WAH!!! Masaki, why is this evil voice of knowing being so cruel?! –cries-

**-twitch twitch- Get over here!!!**

-runs back- Ok!

**Thank you-**

Your welcome!

**-sigh- Isshin Kurosaki… He is a closet pervert.**

I'm not a closet pervert… I'm an open pervert! Everyone knows that!

**O.O… Isshin Kurosaki… He scares me…**

Ah! Don't be scared!

**Isshin Kurosaki…** **He has a thing for the night nurse…**

WHAT?! I WOULD NEVER LEAVE MASAKI LIKE THAT! –runs to poster- I'M SO SORRY!

**Agh! This is getting me no where!**

Squeak?

**O.O… Squeak?**

Ya! Squeak, such a funny word.

**Random much… Isshin Kurosaki… He bathes in bustle sprouts and cauliflower.**

Actually, there are some carrots thrown in too!

**You know, maybe I'm going insane, cause I think he just admitted to bathing in vegetables.**

How does that make you insane?

**-ignore- Isshin Kurosaki… He despises his children, and has a vault under the stairs that contains plans and blueprints made for his absolute revenge to kill off his kids so he can become the main character in the series he doesn't know he's in.**

-more tears- I'm in a series and I didn't know it! And I don't hate my children!!!!! WAH! –runs to poster- Masaki, this derangded voice that has no body is wrong! I love our children!

**-twitch twitch- Get over here before I burn that poster!**

-runs back- Sorry! Please don't burn it!

**Fine… Now you know, Isshin Kurosaki.**

-stands there-

**Go away.**

No.

**-growl-**

AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! –runs away-

**Pft… Pansy. **

_Up Next- Uryu Ishida_

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I tried to get all your ideas in there! I tweaked a few so it would fit more and added on to some of them too! And to honor those who helped here is the **"Hall of Help"**-

**Princesssayuri1**

**Sasukes-girl08**

**Salrineth**

**Cyric Z**

Thank you all for your help! You gave me so many good ideas! Thanks! See ya guys later! Don't forget to leave a review!


	7. Uryu Ishida

This might not be mt best because it was written in a rush, but I wanted to give you guys another chappie because you guys rock! YAY!! Cookies for all!

Disclaimer- I own absolutely nothing

**Broadcaster host person**

Character

"_Up Next" or Security_

----------------

**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars-**

**Uryu Ishida… He hates sewing to a fault.**

Huh, what do you mean, I love sewing!

**And why do you hate sewing, I'll tell you. It's because-**

-chucks recently made rabbit thing at the window (it's one of those windows the police use, you can see them but they can't see you)-

**AH! It's the attack of the rabid toy bunnies!!! –hides- I knew this would happen, I knew it!**

-sweatdrops-

**-peeks over table- is it gone?**

-face palms-

**Umm… Ahem, Uryu Ishida… Is a pansy who likes dancing threw thorn bushes.**

Uhh –still confused-

**With his hair on fire.**

-blinks- Wait, WHAT!!!?

**Hee hee. Uryu Ishida… He enjoys eating strawberries (hidden meaning XD).**

-Ichigo comes in- WHAT!!!

**What is up with you people! Do you want to go again!?**

(Ichigo) No… Just out of curiosity, where are you?

**Far away from you! Now go away!**

-Ichigo pouts and walks off-

**Geez, I thought he would never leave.**

You and I both.

**Your still here?**

-raises eyebrow- Why wouldn't I?

**You know what, never mind. Uryu Ishida… He thinks Quincys are pansies from Mars.**

What?! How dare you disrespect the Quincy! I shall show you their wrath! –starts shooting arrows at window-

**AHHHH!!! HELP!**

-Ichigo, Shiro, Renji, and Rukia suddenly appear-

(Ichigo) Bankai!

(Shiro) Sit upon the frozen heavens, Hyourinmaru!

(Renji) Howl, Zobimaru!

(Rukia) Dance, Shirayuki!

**AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! **

-all is silent-

(Shiro) Hooray!

(Renji) YAY!

(Ichigo) She's finally dead!!!

(Rukia) Take that!

(Uryu) Uhh, sure… Ya!

**BUHA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!! I am still alive! Nothing can kill me!**

-all gasp-

**That was my decoy! And now, because I said so, you are all ban from here, Bu ha ha ha haha! Security!!!**

-all scream-

_We've got them! Get out of here scum!_

-all scream again as they are thrown out-

**Buhahahahahahaha! Now you know how crazy Uryu is and how stupid the rest of them are!**

_Up Next- Chad Yasutora_

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Like I said, not my best, but hey, that doesn't really matter does it XD? Alright, now I should update again tomorrow but then once the week starts up I most likely won't update again till Saturday because I'm going to be busy, so ya. Don't forget to leave a review!


	8. Sado Chad Yasutora

My computer broke again and I am using a friend's laptop to get this to you guys so sorry about the delay! Chad was kinda hard and I forgoit to ask for help but my friend who loves Chad gave me a few ideas, so I hope you like it! Also, I will try and update again sometime but I have a ton of things I need to get done so no promises on more then two updates this week, sorry. Anyway, here you go, the next chappie of _Know Your Stars- Bleach Edition!_

Disclaimer- Me no own -sob- so sad!

* * *

**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars-**

**Chad Yasutora… He likes to eat bunnies for breakfast.**

"…."

**Chad Yasutora… He is a human bullet bag.**

"…."

**What is wrong with you! Don't you ever say anything!**

"…."

**I like Kisuke better, at least he gave me more of a reaction!**

-blinks- "…."

**You know what, do I have to speak Spanish for you?!**

"…."

**Como' estas? Me llamo Broadcaster. (How are you? I am (My name is) Broadcaster.)**

"…."

**What are you, emo? Deaf perhaps (no offence to those who are!)?!**

"…."

**I give up! This is like a one sided conversation! –walks off-**

Who was that? –asks randomly to no one-

**-runs back in- He talks!!! Hooray! **

-stares at nothing- "…."

**No! I ruined the progress! -sob-**

"…."

**Ok, got over that. I might as well make fun of him for no reason.**

"…."

**Chad Yasutora… He is a mute person who wipes his face with raspberries.**

"…."

**Chad Yasutora… I think he eats nails for breakfast too, but I could be wrong.**

-scratches head- "…."

**-sigh- T****his is no fun.**

… What's not fun?

**-gasp- He talks he talks! –starts jumping up and down- YAY!!!!!**

-scoots away from where voice is coming from-

**-crash- OW, I stepped on a cord and tripped.**

… ha ha ha ah bu ha ha ha!!!!!

**-wide twitchy eyes- He's crazy!!! Crazy!**

"…."

**-pouts- Damn.**

-just sits there-

**Ok, you know what!? I'm gonna bring out the heavy artillery! -brings out a gun of some kind-**

**This is the "Mega Ultimate Laser Bullet 'Killer Ray' Thingy Gun Blaster!" Buhahahahaha! Now you have to talk, so tell us a little about your self.**

"…." –not fazed-

**AGH!!!! Your no fun at all! –charges up gun- I know Tite Kubo is going to have a fit and probably sue me, but this guy is pissing me off so much I don't care! **

-O.O- WAIT!!!!

**He just talked –gasp- YAY!! I did it! –points gun at him- Now start talking!**

I like the color pink-

**-rolls eyes- We know that. Give us something good… Something Juicy!**

I have a pair of footy PJ's that are pink, frilly, and covered with lace! Please don't shoot me!

**-gap O.O- Holy Shit… that's so stupid it's funny… but not very original… Tell me something not original or I'll shoot your head off!**

Ok, OK –sob- I have a picture of Ganju under my pillow!

**-twitch twitch gap… totally thrown off- Ok… And why do you have a picture of Ganju under your pillow?**

Don't know, I guess it's because it has an awesome sunset in the background.

**-sighs relieved- Oh good, for a second I thought you were gay!**

"…."

**Your not gay are you?**

"…."

**Ok, you know what, I'm done, I don't wanna know anymore!!!**

"…."

**Now you know, Chad Yasutora… unfortunately.**

"…."

_Up Next- Orihime Inoue _

* * *

I hadn't meant to make Chad gay, or something, but I couldn't help it! I thought it was pretty funny reading it over again! I hope you liked this chappie! Leave a review on your way out!

-Help- I need some ideas for Orihime, I started on her today on my friend's laptop and we ran out ideas so when you review, please leave an idea as well!


	9. Orihime Inoue

I'm sorry! I said I was going to update last week but I got caught up in something! And that something will be told to you at the end in the ending Authors note thing! Now here's the long awaited chapter!

Disclaimer- Me no own

Warning- Personally I don't _hate _Orihime, I just think she's a wuss so, ya. Sorry to those who like her.

**

* * *

****Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars-**

**Orihime Inoue… She hates cooking.**

-softly- I don't hate cooking.

**Why does she hate cooking?**

But I don't hate cooking.

**Orihime Inoue… She has no brain so she's gonna have to go to the Wizard in the city of Oz.**

-question marks- Wizard from Oz?

**Oh no, it's spreading! The stupid is spreading and now she has no courage!**

I do too have courage!

**Hmmm, maybe we should make her take the stupid test. **

Will you cut it out?!

**Cut what out red-head?**

-glares-

**Orihime Inoue… She is suicidal.**

Suicidal?

**My point exactly.**

-question marks-

**-sigh- This is boring… -snaps figures- I know! –rustle rustle- –plays elevator music- Damn, wrong CD. –rustle-**

-more question marks-

**Aha, here it is! –plays "We're off to see the Wizard"- hee hee, this just sets the mood perfectly!**

I don't get it.

**Of course you don't.**

Now that's not very nice.

**-shrugs- I'm not a very nice detached voice.**

Detached voice? –gets scared-

**I was joking.**

-cowering in corner-

**Orihime Inoue… She says she loves Ichigo, yet she joins sides with the guy trying to, I don't know, KILL HIM!**

I was saving him!

**That's what you say, yet you try not to escape.**

I do to!

**You probably dissed Ichigo with that green eyed dude, what was his name again?**

Ulquiorra.

**See, if you were in love with Ichigo, then you wouldn't that other dude's name!**

-crys-

**Ha ha ha! Orihime Inoue… She stuffs her bra to give us the appearance that she has extremely large boobs.**

These are all natural, why would I even stuff my bra?

**That's a question only you can answer.**

-pouts-

**Orihime Inoue… She stalks Ichigo but loves that green eyed dude better.**

I do not, now stop it!

**Orihime Inoue… Her cooking nearly killed her brother when he was alive.**

-bursts out crying- Oh brother, why oh why!

**-mutters- Ok then… You know what, I'm bored of watching you cry over shit like this so you know what! I'm leaving you!**

Wait don't go! You understand me!

**I do not!!! Bye!**

Wait, please!

**-foots steps fade-**

-sniff sniff- Now you know… me –sob-

**-sighs- Such a sad little girl… who has artificial boobs.**

Agh, not that again!

**Hee hee.**

_Up Next- Yoruichi Shihouin_

* * *

I got caught up in writing a story for Fruits Basket. If you love Fruits Basket and you love Oc's then the story I'm writing is just the thing for you! I'll be posting it at some point, either this week or next week... Or possiably the week after **; D**. Anyway, 45 reviews? You guys rock! You all get cookies! And for those who helped, you get seconds! hee hee! **The Hall Of Help-**

Bloody-Ribbon

Sasukes-girl08

Kimsa Ki-Lurria

Princesssayuri1

m-chan12311994

Salrineth

Thank you all for the help! Don't forget to leave a review on your way out!


	10. Yoruichi Shihouin

Hello, and welcome back to **Know Your Stars: Bleach Style!** Instead of boring you with boring details of my life and the many excuses I could probably come up with, we're going to go ahead and skip right to the story!!!

I own nothing! (crawels to emo corner)

**Broadcaster**

Character

(actions)  
_Up Next_

-------

**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars-**

**Yoruichi Shihouin… can I have your autograph!!!**

Um… sure, come on down and I'll give it to ya!

**Ok- Wait a second- you're just trying to lure me out of my little hole of protection!!! Buhahaha, thought you had me there didn't you?!**

(sweat drops) What are you talking about? You wanted my autograph, I don't know where you are, but you obviously know where I am… currently sitting… Do you want my autograph or not?

**So nonchalant, so cool!!! Yes I want it! I want it so bad! (crash) oh shoot!**

(raises an eyebrow)

**Hold on, I'll be right there! (footsteps)**

…

**(more footsteps)**

…

**(several locks are unlocked and a door opens and closes; a pulley lowers a table with a piece of paper and a pencil on it) Alright, pick the paper up and write your name on it.**

You didn't just come down here why? (writes name and puts paper back on table, pulley pulls back up)

**Precautions.**

Ok.

**Anyway- Yoruichi Shihouin… she secretly likes catnip because she can turn into a cat.**

(licks lips) yep.

**(shocked) Really? How cool! Ahem, Yoruichi Shihouin… likes to wander around naked because she's bi.**

I wouldn't go as far as saying bi, I just like the breeze.

**Ack, tmi! Tmi!**

What?

**Too much information.**

(nods)

**Yoruichi Shihouin… loves Kisuke and is having an affair behind his back with Soi fon!**

(shrugs) it's not much of an affair if she's the one stalking me.

**Huh? I don't understand. She stalks you?**

(nods)

**Buhahahaaha! That is so rich!**

I guess so.

**Yoruichi Shihouin… She gets stalked and is having an affair with Soi Fon!**

It's not an affair, and I just said that she stalked me, Captain Obvious.

**Yoruichi Shihouin… She's so gullible!**

What does being gullible have to do with what we were just talking?

**She's so gullible, that if you look up the word in a dictionary, her picture would be right by it!**

(twitch) sigh- whatever

**Yoruichi Shihouin… She likes catnip as said before, but it's her own way of getting high too!!!**

You'd be right.

**Yoruichi Shihouin… she's high off catnip right now!!!**

Actually, not this time.

**Yoruichi Shihouin… she's so high, she'll give the audience a strip tease!!**

Sorry, but that's only reserved from Kisuke.

**(stumbles) So you are with him… (thinks back to chapter 5)… Ya, I guess that would be the case (nods).**

Yep…

**…**

…

**I wonder what catnip tastes like…**

It's pretty good (nods)

**Really? Well, let me go try some. (shifting noise)**

You have catnip up there?

**Idk, I'm just double checkin'- Aha, here's some!**

Idk?

**I don't know (pops top on catnip, sniff) it doesn't smell very good.**

Oh, but it is! Can I have some?

**Hold on! (tastes catnip) Ack- This shit is nasty!!! Water, where's water!!! (running around) AHHH!!! WATER, WHERE"S WATER DAMN IT!**

O.O Can I have the catnip now?

**Yes!! YES!! This stuff is nasty! I don't understand why the heck you like this stuff!!! (chucks catnip out onto pulley and lowers it down)**

You weren't even doing it right, you're supposed to eat it with salmon… (pick catnip up)

**Too late for that now!!! Leave me now, so may go fetch myself something to get this crappy taste out of my mouth! It's not even better than dog food!!  
**

You've tried dog food? (stands up and walks away)

**I-I didn't say that.**

Nice (disappears)

**Is she gone? Now you know Yoruichi Shihouin… Kinda… Now where the hell is that water I needed?!**

_Up next: Ganju Shiba_

-----

I'm warning you all now, I probably won't update for awhile… I haven't watched bleach in forever and I need to re-connect with the characters. I'm gonna try to update this whenever possible but I can't promise anything.

That note aside, thanks to all who reviewed!!!! 60 f-ing reviews is a lot for such a small… under-updated story… You guys f-in' rock my sox and beat my expectations for this story by like 40 reviews!!! Thanks for staying loyal throughout this whole… "break"…. You guys are my inspiration! Thanks again!

I'm not gonna ask you to review, but it would be much appreciated.


	11. Ganju Shiba

Hello there my faithful reviewers and welcome to another episode of _Know Your Stars: Bleach Style_! Thank you for waiting so long for another chappie. I was looking over all the old chappies and I suddenly had a burst of inspiration! So without further ado-

Here's Chapter 11!

**Broadcaster**

Victim

_Up Next_

**Disclaimer: **It's still the same damn it! Stop bothering me!

* * *

**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars-**

**Ganju Shiba… He has a really big nose!**

What the hell are you talking about, punk?!

**Who the hell are you calling a punk- you… you… you weirdo!!**

Ha, nice retort, where'd you get that, the stupid joke store?!

**WTFH?! I'll kill you!**

I'd like to see you try!

**Agh!… -mutters- go to happy place, go to happy place… -sigh- Ganju Shiba… he's the sand man!**

What the hell is a sand man?

**A guy who plays in sand, duh!**

I don't play in sand!

**Yes you do… how would you explain the sand that shoots out of your hands then?! What do you do collect it?!**

It's my power, god!

**Geez, you sound like one of those ditzy teenagers with attitude problems! Or maybe Harold from Total Drama Island!**

Well, you are a ditzy teenager with attitude problems! And who the hell is Harold?!

**How the hell would you know that?! And it's this guy from this weird survivor remix cartoon show –shrugs- **

I-I don't know… and thanks.

**You're such a retard!... You're welcome.**

Hey, who are you callin' a retard you retard!

**Now look whose retorting is stupid!**

Not mine!

**Well, it's not mine either!**

Yes it is!

**No it's not!**

Yes it is!

**Damn you, you gay asshole! Gah!**

WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING A… -confused- gay… asshole?

**Ha! You didn't think I knew that you and Chad had some kinda fling! But I know! He confessed to it! He even has a picture of you under his pillow!**

-shocked- O.O

**I also have reason to believe that you may possibly be in love with Ichigo now- I can't believe you dumped Chad for some orange haired strawberry!**

What the hell are you talking about?!

**Ha I knew it! You are in love with Ichigo! Ichigo! Ichigo, Ganju is in love with you!**

Ichigo: WHAT?!!!!! O.O

Ganju: NO, IT"S NOT WHAT YOU THINK!

Ichigo: -runs away-

Ganju: No wait! –runs after him- Ichigo! –fades away into the distance-

**Hee hee, I knew it! Why else would he follow him?! Hee hee… ha ha ha… buha ha ha ha ha ha ha –continues maniacal laughter, coughs, chokes on spit, and somehow stayed alive- Ahem, now you know, Ganju Shiba…**

-in the distance- NO THEY DON'T!

**Ah, shut up! -chucks a barrel of popcorn at Ganju- Hee hee.**

_Up Next: Rangiku Matsumoto_

* * *

Yay, another chappie done! I still have like a thousand left to do –anime tears-! Oh well, it's actually kinda hilarious poking fun at the characters… Thanks to everyone who reviewed last time! I wuv you all! Oh, I already have an idea for Matsimoto, but suggestions are always welcome! Thank you! Review if you so desire!!!


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